life ain't easy

life ain't easy.
yup.
&& now,
the fact that it is not easy make me..
heartbr0ken?
disapp0inted?
l0se h0pe?
uh,,
f0r real? i don't kn0w.
i don't know my own self nimore.
im in a destruction process,
i guess.
crap.
dun even know what im writing.
few days ago,
check my result
and?
it was damn horrible.
i am DOOMED!
frustration is in the air,
in fact,
till now the frustration is still within me.

my own frustration,
my parents frustation,
humiliation,
sadness,
disappointment,
OMG.
how on earth i can get thru all of this?
how can i ever face this?
that,
drives me crazy.
i dunno who am i now.
for i am not being myself now.

this girl now,
is not the one her fren used to know.
she lose faith in herself.
she can't face the world,
avoiding the outside world.
lost in the world of frustration.
can't see any light in the darkness she's been thru now.
where is the light?
is there any, for real?

see?
tah pape la cik farah ni mrepek.
haish.
abaikan.
ignore me.
thx for doing so.
sbb, im in process to patch all those frustration i had within.
meminjam kate2 seorang teman,
kite kne gumbira utk menutup ketidakgembiraan.
kan?
maaf, ayat anda diubah sedikit.
utk tujuan komersial.
=P
&
cik lebah (;
thx a lot for making me feel better yesterday.
eventho i dont know for sure,
am i getting better,
getting thru all of this things?
i really2 dont know.
but thanx a million for those words of..comfort (:
aku xperli taw.
sincere,deep from inside ^^

i HAVE to wake up from this mess & failure.
for i am ashamed of myself,
& others too.
to succeed is to wake up from a failure innit?
steps to get up from this failure,
is in progress.
do wish me all the best u can,
will u my dear fren?
(:
thx in advance kayh!

outta 'ere,
assalamualaikum.